1. |
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brussels, belgium, conde nast
no one here is looking past
basking in a shallow light
underwater jesus christ
the mountain milk is dripping down
the breast of the roman daughter now
bled at the tender age of twelve
gave her life for a living hell
i know it's hard to survive
in this life pure of heart
no look backs, no broken pacts
no wished i'd dones, no wished i'd hads
the busy bees of swirling leaves
flying in october’s trees
everyone a single kite
a stringless ghost of summer's final fight
i know it's hard to survive
in this life pure of heart
no look backs, no broken pacts
no wished i'd dones, no wished i'd hads
if you think that you've gone too far alone
you're not alone
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2. |
Tightrope Walks
02:27
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seventeen, think it was a dream,
twenty-two, i'm sure of it,
lunar landings and a fire spit
slowly, slowly, slowly turn
spent those years
locked up in my room,
building mental blocks and deficits,
sometimes i'd stand, sometimes i'd sit
and sometimes, sometimes, sometimes i'd burn
alcoholic misadventures, system errors, interventions
mellow-dramas that never mellow,
tightrope walks require tension
alcoholic misadventures, system errors, interventions,
mellow-dramas that never mellow,
something’s are better left unmentioned
seventeen nightmares and dreams
tell me exactly how it is,
some people stone you, others might slip
and others, still others, some others might care
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3. |
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walking on my own, it's nothing new to me
standing on my own, waiting for a street light to change
but nothing ever really changes
all this anger, all these strangers
i'm a danger to myself sometimes i know
i just wish i could let it go, when i feel so low
and i just don't know
i wish i could let it all go right on by
it's not enough sometimes to cry, i want to run and hide
i want to say good-bye, slip off into the night and go, go, go
cry all night 'cause i love you so
woke up yesterday, holding on your hand
feeling so afraid, i chased you far away from where i am
sometimes i just don't understand
boy turns to man, then turned and ran
i lost my head in the sand that ran through my hands
i wish i was better than i am
i'm doing what i can, i swear i am
but still i see how stupid i can be
how i'm killing you and me
you and me
just you and me
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4. |
Panic Attacks
03:09
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everyday i wake up, who am i trying to impress
getting dressed only masquerades the fact, the fact that i'm a mess
i used to dream in black and white, ideals pushed out to the front
chest out like a tug boat, pulling ego cargo weighs me down
teeth breaking dreams, wake up sweating stream
i think i'm growing up
television glows, empty feeling grows
i think i'm giving up
sunken u-boats colorized, indemnified, i don't ask why
just nod my head and wonder how i slipped so side-stream to the side
panic attacks, i can't relax
i want to bleed
they tell me that i breathe too much, they tell me that i breathe
it's never too late to stop
if heaven is so close, why do i feel so alone
if heaven is so close, why do i feel so alone
if heaven is so close, why do i feel so alone
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5. |
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the ones that wear the worst are the ones that we work
and you know this
but you still insist on wearing yourself so thin, so sad
that all you ever had
wore you down so bad
so bad you couldn't even
enjoy what you had
and it wasn't easy to watch you waste away
but what more could i do?
you wouldn't let me help you
you'd just sit up in your room and cover up your head
and pray to god you were dead
the ones that slip away are the ones that we let go
and it seems so simple
but still we insist on letting go of everything we have
or think we have
and all we thought we had
wore us down so bad
so bad we couldn't even
hold onto what we had
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6. |
Majesty and Bloat
03:01
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do you think he's coming back?
maybe when he gets hungry
and will you take him back?
will you let him fall asleep on top of you?
it's always the same, you're always to blame
and he's so full of himself when he comes home
it's keeping you afloat
the majesty and bloat
if he didn't do it to you, then somebody else would have to
lizard skin and the state you're in
it's rough
but it makes you feel weightless when you're numb
such and angry man
always telling you that you wouldn't understand
all the reasons he's got to be mad
all those years he spent in suburbia
it's never been the same since he started calling you his baby doll
you're just a little toy for him to play with
it's keeping you afloat
the majesty and bloat
he blows you off, it blows you away and it all blows up his ego
lighting storms and flashing light warn
here it comes
but it makes you feel weightless when he comes
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7. |
Ballad of Dora Maar
03:20
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sitting in this room while you're so far away
the light is bad in here so i don't want to write today
i'll lean back on my bed and dream about when we were young
before you got in trouble, before you had your son
sometimes i see stars in the lines between the bars
imaginary lines drawing pictures in my mind
i see you from behind with your hands upon your hips
your clothes are everywhere and there's a song upon you lips
if i stare long enough i can see a lot of things
the tiny room we share before you showed me everything
so naive, i used to want to see you every day
and now your ghost just haunts me and i wish you'd go away
i'm wanting out of here, i'm wanting out of here
i'm wanting out of here, i'm wanting out of here
i'm wanting out of here
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8. |
Whistles Blow
03:50
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dry as a bone you sit and stare
breaths grow heavy and smiles grow rare
how many times have you said to me
while staring into infinity?
whistles blow, whistles blow back
trains don't talk they just make tracks
the sound of the summer as it goes by
sounds like crickets in the night
your mother had twins but one of them died
you try to catch you're breath but it sounds like a sigh
your ears pop as we gain altitude
and your heart sinks at the breath-taking view
whistles blow, whistles blow back
lovers never leave they just talk back
the sound of the summer as it goes by
sounds like lovers in a fight
all you want from the big city
is a touch of anonymity
disappear completely from the scene
but it's not easy to escape reality
you haven't said a word for the last thousand miles
you've got your frowning face in magazines filled with smiles
a sudden darkness overtakes you
you try to hold your breath, but you just turn blue
whistles blow, whistles blow back
trains don't talk they just make tracks
the sound of the summer as it goes by
sounds like crickets in the night
whistles blow, whistles blow back
lovers never leave they just talk back
the sound of the summer as it goes by
sounds like lovers in a fight
whistles blow, whistles blow back
whistles blow, whistles blow back
whistles blow, whistles blow back
whistles blow, whistles blow back
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9. |
Lay Quiet Awhile
02:31
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you lay across your chair ,eyes looking through your hair
so peaceful you make me envious
you stir from your sleep, no words you just blink
and i can't help but wonder what you're thinking
i had nights that i couldn't sleep
and i'd just sit up and listen to you breathe
and i've had days that i walk the streets
fire breathing in between my teeth
i've seen lesser men trying to fence you in
burning your skin with their meaningless words
you just recede away from your shirtsleeves
and at night i listen to you grinding your teeth
as i surrender myself to sleep
arms in the air, reaching for your feet
avocado trees and japanese leaves
blow in the breeze, urging me to sleep
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10. |
Falling Star
02:45
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As "Opal", Kendra Smith and David Roback wrote the lyrics.
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11. |
Living Backwards
08:52
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you and i on a trip
could never get very far
we'd always end up outside
but never get neat a car
every time i think or write or hear your name
i think about churches and all the games we played
and every time i think i'm going to stop looking backwards
i find i'm just craning my neck
and every time i think i'm going to stop living backwards
i find i'm just breaking my neck
once upon a broken lip
a kiss so hip to all my tricks
and once you thought me so shy
but now you just see an old disguise
and every now and then when you hear my name
do you think about the holes we dug and all the games we played?
and every time i think i'm going to stop looking backwards
i find i'm just craning my neck
and every time i think i'm going to stop living backwards
i find i'm just breaking my neck
my neck, my neck, my neck, my neck
looking back will only hurt you, looking back will only hurt you in the end
oh, the games we played
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